Blind Date

Dad and Mom met on a blind date. He was on leave from the Navy she was working at the post office in Stayton he was stationed in San Diego.
They were married in Milton Free Water, Oregon. Dad was handsome in his Navy uniform and Mom lovely in her ivory laced wedding gown. After they moved Mom told me their landlady listened through the apartment walls to hear if mom was vacuuming, thereby using too much electricity or was she stingy?

Eventually they had five girls but Dad wanted boys. They planned names for boys Gary for Grace, Michael for me, Sophie, Stephen then I think he gave up. Dad wrote a letter to his mom he wanted boys, and her reply was “You have five little girls and a farm.”

I heard that if you could kiss your elbow it would change your sex -for me a boy- I stood at the top of our driveway and tried really hard but to no avail. There was an inherent desire to please my dad.

I was in the eighth grade Dad went to Goldendale to visit his mother’s grave I thought. I learned much later that he was deeply depressed and that he had gone to commit suicide. But he came back to the Lord instead. He didn’t get diagnosed as clinically depressed and medication until he was almost eighty. He had suffered with depression far too long.

When Dad came home, our family life was radically changed. It was complicated. He wanted us to have family devotions, we weren’t used him being our spiritual leader. But he was setting our family on the path to becoming whole. I cherish the memories that I have the room and the sight of him holding his Bible. He became a man of prayer, humility and sacrificial giving.

Even though my parents were Christians it didn’t mean everything was okay. They went to a counselor, for typical marriage problems I suppose. His office was at the courthouse, I curious place, I thought. The next appointment he asked for the whole family to come. The table was very long and narrow we girls sat lined up on one side and Dad and Mom on the other. He asked each of us a question, I don’t remember that part. His final conclusion was we girls were doing okay. But Dad and Mom had issues to work out.

I felt very nervous and very small.